The Diceman

So, I went to go see Andrew "Dice" Clay at The Comedy Store last night and even though it was raining, the evening started off with a very good sign--I was able to find street parking on Sunset. Hell yeah.

The comics who came on before Dice were appropriately mysogynistic, overweight/greasy in a pretty unfunny and unsurprising fashion, except for the host, who was actually pretty good.

Then Dice performed and it's pretty clear that this is what he was born to do. Gesturing with an unlit cigarette and wearing his signature fingerless gloves, he kicked ass and I started coughing I was laughing so hard at some of his bits.

One of his rants was directed at the cell phone phenomenon. Here are some quotes from that, which I'm approximating and probably poorly:

"Until they invent a cell phone that can suck dick, I'm not really gonna give a shit about looking at your fucking cell phone."

Another rant was about dating...well, it was a pretty common thread throughout the set, of course.

"Why on Earth would you want to introduce me to your mother? So that I can see what you are slowly but definitely degenerating into? I don't even like how you look that much right now, to be honest."

Good times at the Comedy Store.

That is all.